Lady Gaga - Applause (Official Audio)

Lady Gaga is back with new single, "Applause" from her upcoming album, 'ARTPOP'. Her last single was 2 years ago before she was off for her 18-month long concert tour. She always comes with new style with new album release. Anticipating!

"I live for the applause"

Trigger

Blogger has become more like a space for me to vent recently. The posts can be too personal and not even real life friends can comprehend what I actually feel but all I need are just listeners (or readers). Advice won't really work on me, most of the time. I am usually the one who cheers others but little thing I know whether it has helped them in any way.

Earlier this month my external hard disk crashed which contains lots of files, which include photos from my internship. Unlike hundred GB of videos and series that I have downloaded for past five years which are redownloable, the photos are irreplaceable. Hard disc failure is not as depressing when you are not able to recover back those moments. It will be too costly to recover from a big-size hard drive. If I have the mean, I won't mind going for it. (Thankfully, the photos are saved because there is a backup copy in my home desktop.) Still, I tend to grow sentimental over virtual stuff that I have kept for so long. 

Today, my 4-year-old laptop kept on crashing. I have tried to save it but the effort went down to the drain when in the end the system happened to freeze every time after it started up. My friend who worked in IT industry told me this might due to RAM failure since the laptop managed to start up so it can't possibly be software failure. Surely, my main concern is the files stored in my laptop. I have lost my stuff from my external hard drive and I don't think I can't afford to lose more stuff right now. My friend convinced me that these files can be recovered since they are still accessible before the system freezes. But, I just don't have any budget for that right now. Sigh.

In my own opinion, these are merely small issues which can be easily fixed, as long as you have the money. Nonetheless, these are the little things that trigger a near-miss breakdown. This constantly reminds me for being unemployed and in a way, my disappointment with certain entity. Trying the hardest everyday to diminish the negative feeling but things like these will always remind me. The more I talk about it, the more depressing it is. Okay, change topic.

Just found out that Cory Monteith, the actor who played the role as Finn Hudson on Glee died. I was so shocked when I read Kim Kardashian's tweet. I thought it is a hoax but after googling and I get to know it's true. This news is rather shocking. Before my hard drive died, I managed to have a "glee-athon", rewatching the whole series from the beginning until the very last episode. Glee has been inspiring in its ways together with its cast and hence his death is deeply felt. Gone too soon, may he rest in peace.

The cast come and ago throughout the series but his absence will be deeply felt when season 5 commences this September.

This, reminds me, that life is fragile. 

No Match

"May be there is no matching position yet," she said. It's either the roles are way too easy or too difficult for me to handle, I guess. I don't know. This remains a mystery, unsolved x-file. I am always puzzled but still managed to naively put things together. Ah well, positive way to look at this whole situation is the opportunity to come back tougher and stronger.

Anyway, moving on, this project is long overdue. The idea to make this video is more than a year old but it was never realized until recently with all the free time that I have at the moment and my brother's making video skill. Compressing seven-month journey within a ten-minute clip is not an easy job.

MAMGP Family

It's been more than a year but the memories are always fresh in my mind. We have our good times and also bad times but most importantly we went through them all together. The seven-month truly changes our friendships to a whole new level. "Kawan susah senang" indeed.

Reminiscing one of the best moments in life to keep me going.  

Turning Negative into Positive

Positive thinking is the ability to feel negative when you have to and still maintain enough hope to keep on going. - Quoted

The same cycle repeats daily. Waking up with much hope and expectation and always ending up with disappointment and frustration. No one to comfort myself but me. Every single day is like a battle. The fight seems to be endless. Stuck in the same dilemma over and over again.

A friend of mine told me it's my fault for not pushing it. I let the time decides the path for me while all I did was waiting. This is just so not me. Knowing myself the way I handled events and group projects in university, I always pushed my members in getting their tasks done. The same person right now, has done nothing for past few months. Took several measures once in a while and that was it. I might be jealous of my friends who have started their new life chapters. Jealousy fades when I start to put myself in their shoes. What if I am not ready? Knowing that engineering is not primary interest, will I be up to carry the responsibility which will last me for more than half of my lifespan, God willing? Calming myself down every day that I am taking this chance to be more prepared when the time comes. As little faith that I have in myself, it is never an obstacle in my pursuit.

I wish not to blame anyone for the delay in my employment. I heard stories. The ugly ones. Hearing these accounts make me so easy to point fingers towards you-know-who. I guess I need to be realistic. Equality is an ideal acceptance which is impossible in this realistic world, when luck sometimes plays a key role in deciding your path, no matter how hard you try. No one ever says life is fair. When Machiavelli suggests the end justifies means and most corporations are doing it today, however, I will always fight back that effort is more important than the result. All I ask for is just a fair game, in which I think it is too much to ask for.

Positivity and hope may dwindle over time but I have always managed to raise it back up. When people bring you down, take it as the opportunity to learn to bring yourself up.

I have strategised my measures and now can only hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

Thanks to a friend who pushed me. I owe you one. =)

Blatant Emotion

Finally, fever of 13th Malaysian General Election is over, or is it not? Days and nights, my Facebook feed was and is still occupied with this issue. Well, it only happened once every five years. Prior to 5th May, my Facebook friends were so outspoken about which party they were supporting. It was very prominent that majority of the virtual world community were up for "Ubah". On the other hand, I can count the number of previous government supporters using only fingers. Up to that point, it was apparent that the opposition would actually win this time in becoming the federal government, or so I thought. When the result was announced after midnight yesterday, my Facebook was becoming a mourning site which didn't happen since Steve Jobs died in October 2011. Everyone started to change to their profile picture into black to join the mourning for the so-called death of Malaysian democracy as they claimed the government won via dirty tactics. Accusations were all over the place. Today the feed continues with both positive and negative perceptions of the result. I have been reading lots of feedbacks from all sides, from the statuses, notes, photos that were shared by my friends. Frankly speaking, these have given me views on this issue from more than one perspective.

I am rather neutral in my stand because I may second the idea of changing the government but it does not mean that I detest another party. Reading the immature comments on social network websites, it is such an unfortunate and sad phenomenon to witness that supporters of different parties were bashing one another. This was where people started to share whatever information to bring down the opponent party, convincing the others to change their minds. The share button on Facebook was abused blatantly. There was one incident yesterday where people started to accuse one Malaysian as a foreigner just because he was of dark skin by chinese name. (this was heavily due to the rumor of foreigners were being imported into the country. I used the word rumour because I cannot be 100% sure it is true) When it turned out to be otherwise, apology posts followed. People should realise that by spreading unverified information is just the same as giving proofless accusations. It is like someone accused you for stealing but you persistently denying it but the news already widely spread before you are proven innocent. No matter what you do, you wish to take them back, damage is already done. Imagine how that individual felt for being heavily falsely accused? Conclusion: Read more to know more even from the sources that you hate to get verification and more perspectives.

Following the announcement of the result last night saying the previous government retains for next term, virtual riot occurred. The word "magic" kept on appearing on my Facebook news feed. There were even "memes" of our Prime Minister being a magician. Bad news definitely spreads faster than good news. Most were preaching and claiming the death of Malaysian democracy. Some even claimed shame to be Malaysians, non-stop ranting about how unfair and dirty the election was. They started calling their names. What an ugly side to observe there. I thought you were fighting for better government but how about your attitude and maturity in handling the whole thing? They were so emotionally driven when they post those statements and their friends were going along by liking those statuses. You cried for "ubah" but what kind of "ubah" when you can't even watch your own words. You claimed the politicians were being dirty but you were verbally dirty. There is a saying, "an apple does not fall far from a tree". I seconded an article that I read mentioning, if you want to "ubah" the government, you should "ubah" yourself first. If you wish to vent, get better channels without offending anybody because for some posts, I was really offended, near to provocation but I managed to tone it down. Knowing they were too emotional because we are Malaysians, it is our nature to "cepat melatah". And we wonder why "freedom of speech" is pretty much restricted in this country. 

I vented this much because I was just rather taken aback by the behaviours of the voters. I never said that the party was right all the way but it didn't give me the power to accuse and calling them names. I believe there are more mature ways to rectify the situation. There is no need to add oil into the fire. Just stay calm and be more rational. Isn't that the reason why you can only vote at the age of 21 but such acts don't reflect your maturity. 

The only thing that I can firmly say against our dear Prime Minister for his remarks using the word "Chinese Tsunami" in defence of their loss in certain states. After all the allegations he is facing at the moment and he still has the guts to give such controversial statement after winning the election, when the opposition supporters who were still literally raging about his so-called dirty victory. I am not sure whether is that plain stupid but I really, really hope the politicians should stop unnecessary stir among the citizens. Be wise with choice of words. And so do you!

I have done my vent and deep down I hope everyone will stay cool and do the right thing the right way, with dignity.

Let's pray for another 5 peaceful years of Malaysia. We shall begin with small steps for big changes.